I know that title might sound a little controversial, so let me explain.
So recently I’ve been evaluating my life choices and pondering my future, as I do every week, when I realised I’ve hit a snag. I asked myself the question relatives ask people like me at family reunions all the time: So what do you want to be when you grow up? As I’ve grown the answer to that question changes drastically. When I was 10 and naive, I was certain I wanted to work at Mcdonald’s my whole life. Then when I was 12 I was almost certain I wanted to join professional football, I wanted to be a wide reciever. Then around 13-15, I had thought about being a fireman, I wanted to save lives, I felt like it was my duty. Then now, at 16, I’m aware of all the options, and I realise how many jobs there are. It was a lot easier when I was young, because I didn’t know how many jobs there could possibly be. But now, I have no idea what I am to do. I started thinking about my potential, and what talents I have. Well, I could be a fiction writer, but my imagination and motivation won’t get me too far. I wanted to play piano, but I never knew what kind of jobs that would get me. It’s not like I’m a skilled songwriter, I just play piano for worship music as a hobby. Even further I look at jobs within the Church, and over the past I feel like God is making it clearer and clearer that my place is in the Church, but I’m just not sure what yet. If I tried and really worked hard, I COULD be a writer, or play piano professionally in a band if I wanted to. But so many times I look at the difficulty, and I say: “God will point me where I need to be, I shouldn’t push myself.”
Is that trusting God, or is that straight up laziness? I can’t tell if it’s God saying to wait, because he has a plan for me soon, or if it’s the devil trying to keep me contained, and not work too hard, to choose the easy life. What is it? I’m self conscious that maybe God has been trying to prepare me for a job I haven’t even considered yet, and when he reveals his plan to me, what if I’m not ready? Does he want me to write more posts on the blog? Does he want me to keep playing piano? Does he want me to get out and talk in front of people, instead of behind the safety of my room/phone? What if when God gives me an oppurtunity to serve, my skillset won’t be enough? Or does it not matter if it’s enough? There’s a constant fear in my heart that I’m not doing enough in God’s eyes. I could be whatever I want to be if I work for it and put my heart to it, but deciding what is worth putting my time and effort into is a struggle. What if I decide to seek an english degree and pursue writing, but later I’m given oppurtunities to be a pastor or teacher in Church? Did I spend my time on the right thing, even if God directed me somewhere completely different?
That’s the kind of stuff that can keep you up at night. Struggling to identify what’s worth putting your time into. But certainly doing nothing isn’t the solution right? Maybe God WANTS me to take some blind leaps, and take chances, and be a risk taker. Maybe God will reveal his plan after I start working towards what I want to do. So to explain the title, maybe God wants us to take risks and trust he’ll guide us through them, not do nothing and wait for him to give us a sign, while we comfortably sit back and do nothing. God has made i clear in the bible what he wants us to do: Give glory to God, love God and others, and serve all people. We can do those things anytime, we don’t need direct orders from God, because the bible already told us to do it.
So in conclusion, faith does take some trust in God, sometimes it requires waiting, but there is so much we can do before God gives us the whole plan. He might want me to be a pastor, or he might want me to be a worship leader, or he might want me to be a missionary, or just a writer. But there are many ways to serve God and others before I figure out what job he wants for me in the long term. So whether I have it all figured out, or I have no idea what I’m doing, I still need to serve and love others, for God has told me to do so.